What Betrayal Feels Like: You’re Not Crazy

By: Dr. Yaacov Rosedale, PhD, LPC, CASAP

If you've been betrayed, you're probably riding an emotional rollercoaster that no one warned you about. One moment you’re numb. The next you're sobbing. Then you're enraged. Then confused. Then right back to numb again.

Let me tell you something straight: You're not crazy. You're traumatized.

Infidelity doesn’t just break trust—it shatters reality. You start to question everything: “Was any of it real?”

“Did I miss the signs?”

“Who even is this person I thought I knew?”

And the most painful one: “What does this say about me?”

Many betrayed partners describe symptoms that mirror PTSD: hypervigilance, flashbacks, nightmares, racing thoughts, anxiety, difficulty concentrating, and a deep sense of emotional dysregulation. This is relational trauma—real, raw, and not to be minimized.

You may be obsessively checking their phone, replaying conversations, needing to know every detail—or wanting to know nothing at all. One day you might want to save the relationship. The next, you're ready to burn it all down. All of this is normal.

Your nervous system has been hijacked by betrayal, and your brain is working overtime trying to keep you safe.

You might also feel deeply alone. Most people—even well-meaning friends—don’t know how to hold space for this kind of pain. They say things like, “At least it wasn’t physical,” or “Just move on already.” But this isn’t just about sex or a one-time event—it’s about the rupture of emotional safety.

Here’s the truth: Healing is possible. But you’re not expected to figure it out alone.

Therapy can help you feel grounded again. It can help you name what happened, understand the trauma response, and slowly rebuild your sense of worth, stability, and—if you choose—reconnection.

And no, healing does not always mean staying. Healing means becoming whole again. It means making choices from a place of strength, not pain.

In the next post, we’ll explore how therapy can help you move forward—whether as a couple or on your own.

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If this resonates with you or someone you love, reach out. I’m here to help.

—Dr. Yaacov Rosedale, LPC, PhD, CASAP

yaacovmr@gmail.com   | +972-52-8084406  | 513-599-6700